Weekly Briefing from the North Texas Apocalypse Bunker, 9/30/22

Brand New Leaf Edition

Sep 30, 2022

Everyone in administration would like to sincerely apologize for the recent hiccups in the Friday briefings. Things have been interesting here at the Bunker, but thankfully not needlessly complicated; rather, we’ve all had a few extra action items on our weekly To Do List. Add to that a few prescient deadlines for both current and future projects and it was a perfect storm of bureaucracy and nonsense.

We’d like to thank the Division of Media Review for covering for us in our notable absence. They did a great job under tremendous pressure—after all, it takes the whole team just to watch She-Hulk every Thursday morning—and we appreciate their sacrifice.

Pupdate: Epilogue

The bunker mascot is finally home, after an extended convalescence at our family vet. As soon as we got her in the car, I felt a knot in my chest let go. I hadn’t realized how much angst I’d been holding in, worrying about her.

The good news is this: she won’t have to have surgery on the leg. Thanks to a lot of rest and a lot of fussing, the leg healed by itself. Crisis averted. However, her days of running up and down the stairs like a sugar-riddled toddler are officially over. Her tendon is more or less where it needs to be, but it’s left her with far less strength in her back legs. Her carriage was always wobbly and her gait sometimes drifted to one side or the other, but now that’s her default setting. She can get around with little difficulty, and here’s the thing—she wants to go and blow like she used to—but her body’s just not willing.

She also lost some weight, partially due to a complication with her delicate stomach and partially because she was away from us for such a length of time. Suffice to say, her appetite is undiminished, and she will undoubtedly bankrupt me with her expensive food again. Also, she gets the senior discount—she’s on four pills, one of which is a probiotic to keep her gut flora in bloom or somesuch.

Her new “crate” is the downstairs office in the theater. I’m moving all of my daytime operations downstairs to be with her. When we’re down there, she does what she always does: finds a place to lay down between us and slumbers lightly until someone says any word that rhymes with “Out.” She’s still Sonya. My sweet old girl. God, how I missed her.

A victory roll in the grass at the court house, across the street.

Report Filed by the Agency of Health and Wellness

Everyone in Administration has either committed or re-committed to the extreme protocol that produced such marvelous weight loss results for the Administrator the first time around. They have only been on it for a week, but already the results are encouraging: the director is down 9.4 pounds and the head of Bunker Ops is down 4.6 pounds and 3 inches overall. Admittedly, Bunker Ops wasn’t exactly thrilled about where those inches came from, but has been reassured that the losses would even out over time.

I am once again in Cruciferous Hell…and how SPEED METAL does that sound, I ask you? “CRUCIFEROUS HELL!” GiggaGiggaGigga “CRU-CI-FER-OUS HEEEELL!” GiggaGiggaGiggaGigga (repeat 4 times for maximum metal)

Everyone is adjusting to the new food regimen, and the bunker is once more filled with the smells of roasted pork, baked chicken, and so very much cauliflower and broccoli. At Bunker Op’s insistence, additional vegetables have been procured, but it remains to be seen how they will be prepared.

October 2022

The month is upon us. And I’m very busy, with stuff to do, people to see, places to be, and tricks and treats to be administered in an as-yet-undetermined ratio. Thanks to our Social Media Overlords, you may get a reminder or two about Cathy. You may be tempted to reach out to me and offer sympathies. Please don’t.

I know you love me, care about me, and you just want to make sure I’m okay. I am. Or I will be. I don’t know, exactly, but I do know this: despite all well-meaning intentions, if you do reach out to me, my first thought will be, “Well, I was doing fine until you brought it up!”

I trust that you know if I need to talk, y’all will all be the first people I talk to, after my inner circle (unless you’re in my inner circle, and then you’ll get to hear about it twice). But just so we’re on the same page: my being busy as hell this year was completely intentional, and furthermore, part of the plan.

Case in point: On Saturday, October 1st, at 2 PM, I’ll be presenting a talk at the Museum of North Texas History in Wichita Falls, Texas, titled “The Last Jewel in the Crown: The Vernon Plaza and the Interstate Theater Company.” I’m the last speaker at the museum for a multi-venue exhibit spearheaded by the Wichita Falls Alliance for Arts and Culture’s Regional Museum Network called Reel to Real: North Texas in the Limelight. You can read more about the fourteen county multi-museum exhibits here, and if you’re in the area and want to see me live and in person, talking about the Texas film industry and the history of the Vernon Plaza Theater, you can get all of the details here.

Later in the month, I’ll be making a brief appearance in Waco as Janice’s arm-candy. She’ll be making a personal appearance at the Heart of Texas Storytelling Guild’s annual October event, Oakwood Cemetery’s Walking Tales. The storytellers stand by the graves of famous and noteworthy Waco luminaries and talk about their lives as people stroll up. If you’re going to be in the Waco area, this is a don’t-miss event.

Until Janice started participating, no one was talking about Mollie Adams, a well-known early entrepreneur, who ran one of the only legal brothels in the United States, right in the shadow of Baylor University. You won’t want to miss her lively presentation, to be sure.

After that, can find me in Madison, Wisconsin, from October 20th to the 23rd at GameHole Con. Yeah, that’s really what it’s called. But there will be a lot of indy game makers and zinsters there, so I’m going to get my schmooze on and throw some dice around before I turn 53. Oof.